Tuesday, May 11, 2010

I Trust in You

Preaching was a good experience. It was challenging. There were several times as I was preparing that I asked myself, "How do pastors do this every week?" There were many times where I was absolutely exhausted... times where things weren't coming together as I expected them to... times where I struggled to remember what chapter I was able to look up... times where I was absolutely not excited about the most exciting thing in the Bible--redemption... etc. But, God is so faithful! When He calls you to do something, He always provides the strength to do it. He graciously allowed me to see my physical weakness in preparing to preach the Word. I will say that I spent a lot of time pouring over the Word and thinking through things; however, it was His strength sustaining and His hand guiding. I am very thankful that I had the opportunity to preach the Word--it was good for me, good for my heart, good for my dependence on Him, etc. It gave me a whole new perspective on what a pastors job actually looks like. It gave me new insights into how I can be praying for my pastor during the week as he studies the Word. Thank you for praying for me.

As I am back to the "normal" things of life this week, I am continually reminded of that phrase in "How Deep the Father's Love for Us"--His faithfulness, my standing place. I am dependent on Him, yes. What I don't often realize is that I am much more dependent on Him than I seem to think. The moment I seem to think I don't need to depend on Him, He is faithful to show me just how quickly I can stand no longer. His faithfulness is my standing place--truly. I am reminded of Psalm 143:8.
Let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning; for I trust in You; teach me the way in which I should walk; for to You I lift up my soul.

I am in a place where I really need His guidance... in a more specific sense. I am so thankful for His guidance through the Word and through the godly counsel of others, but I really could use some specific guidance. God, Your compassions never fail, your mercies are new every morning. I trust You! Your faithfulness is my standing place. I trust You! Show me where You want me to go. I trust You! I know without a shadow of a doubt that You do what is best and that You never fail. I trust You! But, I don't trust you like I should. I believe! Help my unbelief! Give me a tender heart for Your ways, a heart of full submission and obedience, a heart that needs only the slightest nudge to run in the direction You guide me without looking back, a heart that trusts You.

3 comments:

Angel said...

I am an artist with bipolar disorder and a Christian.
Does bipolarity effect my faith? Yes. Can I do anything about that? No. God bless you brother.:-)

Daniel Osborne said...

Thanks for commenting. I know basically nothing about being bipolar. I can't imagine the struggle that goes with that to keep Him at the center of your life, but I do know that He provides enough strength to do so. Keep pressing on to know Him.

Sarah F said...

Daniel, I wanted to comment and let you know what a blessing your blog is! Stay strong and keep writing "brother"!

Your sister in Christ,

Sarah-